You may have seen the "life lessons" email from an anonymous Mother in Austin, Texas...
> Things I've learned from my Boys (honest and not kidding):
> 1.) A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000 sq. ft. house 4inches deep.
> 2.) If you spray hair spray on dust bunnies and run over them with roller blades, they can ignite.
> 3.) A 3-year old Boy's voice is louder than 200 adults in a crowded restaurant.
> 4.) If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor is not strong enough to rotate a 42-pound Boy wearing Batman underwear and a Superman cape. It is strong enough, however, if tied to a paint can, to spread paint on all four walls of a 20x20 ft. room.
> 5.) You should not throw baseballs up when the ceiling fan is on. When using a ceiling fan as a bat, you have to throw the ball up a few times before you get a hit. A ceiling fan can hit a baseball a long way.
> 6.) The glass in windows (even double-pane) doesn't stop a baseball hit by a ceiling fan.
> 7.) When you hear the toilet flush and the words "uh oh", it's already too late
> 8.) Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke, and lots of it.
> 9.) A six-year old Boy can start a fire with a flint rock even though a 36-year-old man says they can only do it in the movies.
> 10.) Certain Lego's will pass through the digestive tract of a 4-year-old Boy.
> 11.) Play dough and microwave should not be used in the same sentence.
> 12.) Super glue is forever.
> 13.) No matter how much Jell-O you put in a swimming pool you still can't walk on water.
> 14.) Pool filters do not like Jell-O.
> 15.) VCR's do not eject "PB&J" sandwiches even though TV commercials show they do.
> 16.) Garbage bags do not make good parachutes.
> 17.) Marbles in gas tanks make lots of noise when driving.
> 18.) You probably DO NOT want to know what that odor is.
> 19.) Always look in the oven before you turn it on; plastic toys do not like ovens.
> 20.) The fire department in Austin, TX has a 5-minute response time.
> 21.) The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make earthworms dizzy.
> 22.) It will, however, make cats dizzy.
> 23.) Cats throw up twice their body weight when dizzy.
> 24.) 80% of Men who read this will try mixing the Clorox and brake fluid.
Well, I forwarded that email on to a guy at work, child 3 of 9 (6 boys and 3 girls), saying I'd like to hear some Life Lessons from his mom. He responded and I about pee'd my pants. His responses will be in the next blog post, so this won't get too long.